To Whom it May Concern:
I hesitated about writing this post. You people already get enough attention, usually for stupid things like having fender benders or buying new breasts, and I don't like to contribute to that nonsensical and wasteful aspect of American culture. However, some of these things have to be said. I can't keep pretending. I cannot stay silent anymore, various celebrities! Here goes:
(1) To LeVar Burton: How is it that you aren't aging? Seriously, I saw an episode of Reading Rainbow a few weeks ago, and your skin is so smooth it looks like marble. Are you getting botox? Is it genetic? Or, is Matt right, and you've used your visor and the transporter to create an anti-aging device? What's the secret??
(2) To Dan Radcliffe: Dan . . . . dear, sweet Dan. You're adorable as Harry Potter, but . . . what is this? And this? And this? I get that you're in a play (a fairly well-known, but odd, play) and that you're trying to make Serious Actor career moves. I guess I respect that. But I have to say, I never thought I'd be afraid to look at a picture of you because I might end up seeing Harry's magic wand, if you know what I mean.
Thank you for your time,
R
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
oh dear god. those pictures of harry are really frightening. especially the horse one. is this voldemort's latest evil plot playing itself out?
seriously, though, it seems like all child actors do this to themselves. you know, the "i'm a serious adult actor now--really, i swear" dance. remember when lisa bonet (denise from "the cosby show") did that horrifying semi-porn movie in the '80s? i think it was called "angel eyes." (thankfully, i haven't seen it, and i never plan to).
the question is WHY. why do they do it? it never ever works. and if they ever have doubts about whether it might work, they can just go back to that picture of naked harry potter and the white horse. and yes, rach, that one's a little too close to his magic wand for comfort.
(this post was the comic relief i needed right now. thank you.)
That was pure genius!
Post a Comment